Archive for 'Jokes and such'

Time to die - Joke

Time to die - Joke

Posted on 28. Aug, 2009 by The Troll.

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A 45 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience.  Seeing God she asked ‘Is my time up?’ God said, ‘No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live.’ Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the [...]

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Beer vs. face cream joke

Beer vs. face cream joke

Posted on 14. Aug, 2009 by The Troll.

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Husband and wife are shopping in Tesco’s when the man picks up a crate of Stella beer and sticks them into the trolley “What do you think you’re doing?” asks the wife ‘They’re on offer, only 10 for 24 cans’, he says “Put them back.   We can’t afford it,” says the wife and they carry on shopping… A [...]

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Marriage counseling joke

Marriage counseling joke

Posted on 05. Aug, 2009 by The Troll.

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Jacqueline and her husband Marc went for counseling after 25 years of marriage. When asked what the problem was, Jacqueline went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married. She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and [...]

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"24 hours to live" joke

“24 hours to live” joke

Posted on 09. Jul, 2009 by The Troll.

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Gina returned from a doctor’s visit one day and told her husband that the doctor said she only had 24 hours to live.  Wiping away her tears, she asked him to make love to her.  Of course he agreed and they made passionate love.  Six hours later, Gina went to him again, and said, “Honey, now I only [...]

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Hot sister-in-law to be joke

Hot sister-in-law to be joke

Posted on 18. Apr, 2009 by The Troll.

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I was happy, My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger [...]

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Awesome Dilbert one-liners

Awesome Dilbert one-liners

Posted on 20. Mar, 2009 by The Troll.

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Here  are some nice Dilbert one-liners… they are hysterical!   1. I say no to alcohol, it just doesn’t  listen.   2. A friend in need is a pest indeed.  

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Irishmen changing a lightbulb joke

Irishmen changing a lightbulb joke

Posted on 08. Mar, 2009 by The Troll.

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With St. Patrick’s Day coming this joke is suitable: How many Irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb? Three… one to hold the later and two to drink until the room spins.

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Man's small unit joke. Triple A battery

Man’s small unit joke. Triple A battery

Posted on 27. Feb, 2009 by The Troll.

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A man went to his appointment with the urologist. In the examining room he told the doctor, ‘Don’t laugh!”Of course I won’t laugh,’ the doctor said. ‘I’m a professional.  In more than twenty years I’ve never laughed at a patient.’

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